8.5.10

...These Little Substitutions...

Three weeks in Kuwait has made me miss Iraq and the past few weeks I have found myself drinking far too much coffee, smoking more cigarettes than I should, and watching endless hours of TV broken up by video games. Missions have come to a halt due to armour refitting and I find myself trying to kill the time with things I usually don’t do back at home. My sleeping and eating schedule is beyond backwards due to trying to keep a sleeping pattern that mimics the ones on missions. Four AM fall asleep, two PM wake up, five PM eat, twelve AM eat…repeat. I write about this because I find it interesting how the routines I had at home have essentially just been replaced with different times and other ‘vices’.

In the comfort of my room back in Florida I find myself sipping on a Scotch as I edit photos and walk around the house to take a break when I’ve grown tired of staring at a screen. Smoking is non-existent habit for me unless I’m at a bar with some friends who enjoy cancer sticks and I’ll puff on a couple along with them, but here, it has changed. I can’t sip on a Scotch after hours of editing, or chase my dog around the house, or go into the fridge for some food to fill me up. So instead I smoke a cigarette or munch on chocolate or walk to other billets in hopes to find someone to smoke a cigarette with me or attempt to pick up my bible and try to not feel like a hypocrite. I’ve replaced an enjoyment with something to fill the mental hole of relaxation that I’ve created out of routine. Have I become addicted to smoking? No. It’s just a substitute for the time being. This deployment has become filled with many little substitutions.

I’m finally leaving for Baghdad again.

Oh…..and it’s Giunta’s Birthday. We are eating Ramen Noodles, scraps from MRE’s, and drinking a six back of near beer.

- The Exodus

1 comment:

  1. Hey Nigel, don't feel like a hypocrite. We all have our vices. tell Guinta I said Happy Birthday.
    Parker

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